Finally finished a full marathon :) achieveing what I set out to at the start of the year when I started running.

The reason I even started running in the first place was simple. It was for the person I like. Superficial, it may sound but that was my motivation. I wanted to keep myself fit, make myself look good, I wanted to make a point that I can actually achieve something.

Irony that the full marathon coincided with me being rejected and learning about the truth.

I was thinking about it the last few days and it all seems to make sense now. My friends around me were right from the start. I was a fool being played right from the start. She never liked me, she never once reciprocate what I did for her. I thought she was different from the other girls - not the usual narcissistic, bitchy kind. She might appear that way but she's the same. Goes into uni and gets randomly attached to this guy she barely know for 6 months.

You never gave me the chance.

It's never the guy that gives up on a relationship. It's the girl who has the change of heart.

I always had faith in this, but you never even attempted to give it a shot.

Yes, LDR is difficult, but its not impossible. Couples have failed, but there are also those that survived and came up stronger. I've been trying so hard all this while but you treated me like a joke.

When I ask my friends for advice, they always scold me for doing so much for someone like you. They said nasty things about you but I never believe what they say. But I guess I was so wrong. 

I'm really hurt and broken now.

And that's the reason why I shaved. For renunciation. To clense myself. To reflect about life. I'm trying hard to move on. Maybe what I said above isn't even what I really think, but just written in a fit of desperation and frustration.

I'm disappointed things have ended this way.

Perhaps it's really time to run.